I've got a 4-5 cm fast growing 'mass' in my left breast. I noticed an egg sized lump mid-late January, got a doctor's appointment within a few weeks (after handing in my gigantic statement in support of moving to Canada and double checking the lump wouldn't just go away on it's own), and was diagnosed with invasive ductal carcinoma 28 Feb. Since then, I've had a whole battery of tests and I get the final results on Wednesday. I have a PICC line fitted Thurs so they no longer have to poke holes in me daily, and chemo will start Friday unless there's something (else) majorly wrong.
It's a lot to get my mind around. It's a flat up confrontation with death, even though I plan to get through it and people have been appearing from all sides to say they have made it through. It's my first complete embrace of medical science and trusting implicitly that the experts know best. I don't feel I have any other choice, and this does seem the type of problem the whole system was created to solve. There is no option of 'trusting my body' for this one, bits of my body already took a seriously wrong turn.
My job now is to turn up and endure whatever treatment throws my way. It's to take good care of myself so I'm as happy and healthy as I can be. It's to keep my girls on an even keel so they're not swallowed up by everything happening around them. It's to sort out an international move so I can take advantage of family support while I'm going through this whole process. It's making sure my mom knows her help is much, much appreciated. It's reaching out to friends and family and being seriously overwhelmed by their reaction (thank you all).
So, that's what I'm going to do.
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